For many years, I focused on what illness had taken from me.
My health.
My energy.
My sense of certainty.
My plans.
My expectations.
And honestly, that was understandable.
When life changes dramatically, loss is often the first thing we notice.
Pain demands attention.
Fear demands attention.
Struggles demand attention.
But somewhere along my journey, God began opening my eyes to something I had overlooked.
The blessings.
Not the obvious blessings.
The hidden ones.
The blessings I almost missed because I was so focused on my suffering.
Looking back now, I can see them everywhere.
I see them in my family.
Through every diagnosis, every surgery, every hospital stay, they stood beside me.
There were days when I didn't have the strength to carry myself.
Yet somehow, I never carried my burdens alone.
Their love became one of God's greatest gifts to me.
There were conversations that brought comfort.
Prayers that brought peace.
Moments of laughter in the middle of difficult seasons.
Those moments mattered more than I realized at the time.
Illness taught me that relationships are far more valuable than accomplishments.
The people who stay beside you during your darkest days are treasures beyond measure.
I also discovered blessings in places I never expected.
I found blessings in waiting rooms.
Not because I enjoyed being there.
But because those waiting rooms taught me patience.
They taught me empathy.
They taught me that everyone is fighting a battle we may know nothing about.
I began noticing people differently.
I became more compassionate.
More understanding.
More willing to listen.
Pain has a way of softening your heart when you allow God to work through it.
One of the greatest blessings I almost missed was perspective.
Before illness, I often lived at the pace of life.
Busy.
Focused.
Rushing from one responsibility to another.
Like many people, I assumed tomorrow was guaranteed.
Illness changed that.
It forced me to slow down.
It forced me to appreciate moments I once overlooked.
A sunrise.
A phone call from someone I love.
A family gathering.
A simple meal.
A quiet evening.
Moments that once felt ordinary became extraordinary.
Because when you've faced the possibility of losing everything, you begin to appreciate everything differently.
I also discovered blessings in the people God placed along my journey.
Doctors who cared deeply.
Nurses who offered compassion.
Friends who prayed faithfully.
Strangers who spoke encouraging words at exactly the right moment.
There were times when God's provision arrived through people.
People who may never fully understand how much their kindness meant.
Yet their presence reminded me that God often answers prayers through human hands and human hearts.
Perhaps the greatest blessing of all was my relationship with God.
I would never have chosen the road I traveled.
I would never have asked for multiple sclerosis.
Or lupus.
Or a heart attack.
Or aneurysms.
before.
But those challenges brought me closer to God than I had ever been.
They stripped away my illusion of control.
They taught me dependence.
They taught me trust.
They taught me that faith grows strongest in difficult soil.
Some of my most intimate moments with God happened during my most painful seasons.
Moments when all I had left was prayer.
Moments when all I could do was trust.
Moments when His presence became more real than my circumstances.
Today, I understand that blessings are not the absence of suffering.
Blessings often exist right in the middle of it.
Sometimes they arrive disguised as lessons.
Sometimes they arrive disguised as relationships.
Sometimes they arrive disguised as growth.
And sometimes they arrive disguised as opportunities to become the person God created us to be.
When I look back over my journey, I still see the pain.
I still see the struggles.
I still see the tears.
But I also see God's faithfulness.
I see His provision.
I see His protection.
I see His grace.
And I see countless blessings that I almost missed while focusing on what I had lost.
What I once viewed as interruptions became invitations.
Invitations to trust God more deeply.
Invitations to love more fully.
Invitations to live more intentionally.
Invitations to discover purpose beyond pain.
Those blessings changed me.
They helped me realize that even in life's hardest seasons, God is still good.
And His goodness is often revealed in ways we never expected.
As I continued reflecting on everything my journey had taught me, I realized there was one place where many of those lessons came together.
A place filled with fear and hope.
Questions and answers.
Waiting and healing.
A place that taught me more about life than I ever imagined.
The waiting room.
And it was there that some of my greatest lessons were learned.